Monday 15 June 2015

deal with debt collectors


Dear Plonker

another extract

 

 

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We would love to ...

place the content of the whole book "Dear Polnker" on email and send out to all ... given permission. But we think that would be unfair to the author (King Aidan).

 

We are re-reading the book, and it is side-splitting stuff. Quite unusually, we have even had a comment back from our printer, asking when the book launch will be, as he wants to get a signed copy of the book from King Aidan himself.

 

Here for your weekend enjoyment, we have a small extract from the opening chapter. NJoy

Chapter 1 - Deal With Debt Collectors

Me: "Who the f*ck is this? This is a case of entrapment! Tell your helper woman there to shut up. Now I am going to make this simple for you both. You are getting paid money to ruin people's lives. You need to go home, look in the mirror and either quit what you do or kill yourselves. Never ring my phone again and F*CK YOU. "

 

I know what you are thinking. Give or take a few words that's exactly the way Mother Theresa would have handled it. I got off the phone with a big red angry head on me, but also felt sort of relieved and proud of myself at the same time. My relief and pride quickly turned to shame when I saw Sharyn and her hippy friends were staring at me like I had just punched a child. This awkward triangular moment occurred. They looked at her, she looked at me, I looked at all of them, shrugged my shoulders and said "My granny can be so demanding." They laughed, but I know laughs, and this was not one of those 'Oh you're so funny everything is okay again' type of laugh, rather it was a 'You need anger therapy and Sharyn should dump you' kind of laugh. The worst kind of laugh, especially from peace-loving hippies with influence on your lovely girlfriend. Incidentally Sharyn did dump me soon afterwards. I blame the banks.

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